a crack
a shudder
a miasmic eruption of
molten lava.
the hatred i spewed
an explosion
soul-crushing guilt with
a prayer for forgiveness.
i knew
i was supposed to have a love far greater
than the one i knew i
owned
for you.
i understood that you were from a
different generation.
an immigrant who came by boat
conquered the seas for you
and your family to
seize life.
a far better one than that
which awaited you in greece.
but you grew cold
frozen
a shell encapsulating your heart;
manipulative,
compulsive
lying was your art.
a stump where
a branch was supposed to grow,
withered and rotting.
you spread misery like
a succubus who
feasts on souls
of the needy.
the desperation to love you,
i feel
comes from a place
which houses my moral sense,
a justice weighing my sins
my actions and
inactions
with the prospect of my salvation.
i’ve come to learn that
it’s just who you are.
molten lava crawls
around you. it cannot touch
you.
but you are melting,
understanding how much you depend
on the daughter, you stabbed in
the back
again and
again.
till there was nothing but a woman
weighed down by the knives
puncturing her skin
staining
contaminating her love
for you. the mother
who didn’t know how
to love her own children.
–ย yiayia, thelis diporta na fas?ย
(grandmother, do you want anything to eat?)
โจ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ต๐ฒ๐ซ๐ป๐ช๐ป๐ ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐ช๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ช๐ท๐ญ๐ป๐ช โจ 