this is my safe place my home my soul. i pour everything i am here, for you to hold these words close to your chest; and for me to purge out these overwhelming feelings iย own. (knowing that this haven of mine is known by people who only want to bring me down is [...]
Tag: anxiety
i want to rip out my voice
I want to rip out my voice and throw it at you make you bleed from words unspoken. the more i scream the less you hear the more i hurt the less you care. i want to rip out my heart and squeeze it and let it rupture in front of your face. so you [...]
but i claw my way back up
gravity takes me down. ... ... ... ears ringing, silence abound. Getย Up.ย Get Up. Get Up. Get Up.ย a mantra a fighting chant, with that i claw my way back up. fingers gripping the ground a leverage i push against, grapple my way to standing. the light? (where is it?) i panic iย feel [...]
gravity takes me down
a life light a flickering beacon, of hope? i can't tell, there is an overcast a mist i can't see through. but my heart is pumping adrenaline firing in my veins, i'm running? i've lost feeling, i'mย stumbling (?) towards that flickering light. too busy trying not to be hit by overhanging branches, rotted stumps, obstructions. [...]
today is a better day
today is a better day. not so much an empty shell but a cracked one with feelings trickling through, a lost soul fighting its way into its Home. i'm smiling. it doesn't take as much effort to move the muscles of my face and showcase a feeling a thought, i'mย here. it's a [...]
today is a bad day
today is a bad day. i should come with a warning a flashing signal letting those around me know, i'm walking a tightrope (soulless) the precipice of which i feel will crumble and leave me stranded Alone. it is not because I feel overwhelmed a riotous overflow of emotion. it's the opposite. [...]
matching flower tattoos & motorbike gears
she was driving when I looked over from the passenger seat. one hand on the wheel, the other adding emphasis to her words a telling symptom of her greekness. like a meteor shredding through earthโs atmosphere smashing into earthโs plains and distorting the landscape, i was suddenly and inexplicably hit by the mortality of the [...]
i’m not like you
I wonโt let myself be broken down, shattered shards of a deconstructed self. I wonโt let myself break under the weight of worlds bearing down on my shoulders. But I know one thing. Iโm not like you. You, who refuses to live in the present but picks at the scars of the past. You, who [...]
I taught for the first time!
Today was my first ever time actually teaching students in a classroom at an actual school. Before y'all go crazy, I am on placement so I didn't just randomly walk into a classroom and hijack the place. I'm meant to be here, honest. And to be quite truthful, it wasn't fantastic but it also wasn't [...]
bathed in moonlight’s dust.
you were watching the stars waiting for your dreams. you were dreaming of life, a life of awe, of wonder. Bathed in moonlight's dust, he saw you reach, but never having, never owning life. your dreams. the stars. you never saw him. but he watched you watch the stars. dreaming, wanting, longing, for you. [...]
โจ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ต๐ฒ๐ซ๐ป๐ช๐ป๐ ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐ช๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ช๐ท๐ญ๐ป๐ช โจ 